Isn't equality about, you know, being equal?

I have never been to Pantheacon. I have no desire, to be honest. A whole slew of big nose Pagans all in one place? I think the ego would kill me. If, you know, the transphobia and hypocrisy didn't.

I'm not going to get into everything - The Wild Hunt has done a wonderful job of rounding up the stories. Go there, read about the situations, and the Z Budapest bullshit, and come back here. Done? Good.

Now, onto my opinion, because that's what I'm good for.

I don't give a shit what some ancient crone from the past says. I think her former contributions are wonderful, but I think she is no longer fit to represent ANY community if she intends to continue spewing hate. All the good she has done is being undone every time she opens her mouth. Either she can modernize and grow, or she can fade away. Either option is palatable to me.

What kills me is that the whole theme of Pantheacon this year was 'Unity through Diversity'. What kind of image are you sending to the people who paid a lot of money to come (some from across country or internationally) only to be left with the sting of rejection, hate, and a sour taste in their mouth? How is allowing this woman to spew hatred expressing any diversity? It's certainly not uniting people, except in vitriol.

An apology from both the organization and Z Budapest, with a vow that this will not happen again. Nothing less. Trans people and the LGTB community have been fighting for equality and acceptance for decades, and for the pagan community to allow this supposed feminist to spit upon their struggle and rights undermines all the good she once stood for. If someone did this to a cis-woman, she would be in uproar. It simply would not stand.

I call bullshit. I am offended, as a woman.

As a Witch.

As a human being.

This cannot happen again.

Interesting video!

I make no secret that I really like Fiona Horne. I have talked to her on the phone, on forums, and twitter. I admire her for being imperfect and talking about her life. Plus, I really like Def FX (and wish they were coming to Halifax this summer). I like that she tries to put a positive spin on modern witchcraft, as I would much rather have someone see her and say 'ah, okay. Witchcraft is pretty benign.'

Anyway.

I found this video on YouTube and I really liked it. It's a long watch, but I think worth it.

Bride's bed

I have yet to have my Imbolc celebration. It doesn't make me feel like a bad pagan or anything, because I have purposefully put it off until I had my little mini vacation. My shop is closed for renos, and while I worked the last two days (which my hamstrings are reminding me today), I have today and the next 2 days off.

I baked some soda bread last week and froze half the loaf for offering. I have a few errands to do today (all on foot, unfortunately, since the buses here are on strike), so I will be soon setting out on foot to make my way through the day. My last stop before home is going to be a secluded spot where I will make my altar to Brigid and leave tokens and offerings. I may have a small picnic before heading home again.

Today feels a bit like a busy body day. I have a lot of things I want to accomplish today.

Solitary life

Thanks to YouTube (which I just put a link to on your right! Go me!), I am starting to work out this whole solitary thing.

At first, it was hard. Even though one of the guys is pagan, we seem to be drifting further apart in practice. He is becoming more lax, I am becoming more focused. I am finding myself less and less drawn to going to community events (whereas before I would have been driven there, rain or shine). I am becoming content in my own little shell of a practice, a practice this is growing only stronger.

It's a strange change for me, but a welcome one. Relying more on myself helps me trust myself, and my own intuition. All the cards said the next few months would be inward, and it has been. Slowly purging out these ghosts of summers past, and making room for strength and love and honesty. Most of all, for trust.

Trust is a hard one for me, always has been. I have been allowing myself small moments of doubt, if only to keep the carefully constructed house of cards that is my trust upright. I am getting better.

And on this new moon, I am growing stronger. I never truly believed that one 'grew' into their power until now, until I realize just how much I have been through in my life and how sturdy I am still standing.

My 30's? They are going to be great. This world had better watch it's back.

Sometimes I feel like... somebody's watchin' me!

image from candledark.net

I thought I'd write a bit more on a topic I recently uploaded a YouTube video for. The question was asked -

If you were outside meditating or doing ritual, how would you feel if someone was watching you?

My answer, as always, is simply that I don't care. I feel I can practice my beliefs anywhere I need to, and I have nothing to be ashamed of. I'm doing anything illegal, and I'm not hurting anyone. I can count the times I've been bothered on one hand, and they've never been a big deal.

I know there is always the concern of being in the 'closet' about being Pagan, and I can understand that to a degree. I am somewhat in the closet from some of my family members (mainly, my devout Catholic grandmother), and I take care not to talk about it, address it, wear any questionable jewelry or anything when I am home visiting her. I've had to hide it in past jobs, but my spirituality has not influenced my past jobs. Other people? Meh.

If someone wants to get their jollies watching me meditate or quietly leave an offering, fine. I'm not stupid - I wouldn't be out alone at night in the woods. Someone always knows where I am. But in the light of day, I'm fine.

Thoughts?

Stop touching my stuff / on to YouTube!

Like a lot of folks, I have altars set up in different spots in my house. On more than one occasion, I have had people handling my things, setting their drinks upon them, or generally disrespecting them. To an outside observer, they are obviously purposefully arranged objects, and it drives me nuts when someone picks up something and doesn't ask first!

I know the rock is pretty, but please put it down.

I hate confrontation and hate to be rude to my guests, but I also don't want people handling my stuff.

On another note, I've gone and gotten myself a vlog on YouTube. Here's the first one!